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What an inspiring conversation this has been!
I believe this is why, as mediators, we often have to explore deeply into people’s hearts and minds to uncover the thoughts or beliefs that keep them anchored in the past. When we’re able to reach that space and help the parties recognize that they “need” or “hope” something instead, that’s a true turning point. From there, they begin shifting their focus toward the future, looking for ways to meet those needs, rather than staying absorbed in the concerns, pain, anger, or sadness that comes from past experiences.
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